RSD and Please Stop Asking How I Am!
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RSD and Please Stop Asking How I Am!
byrd45 Mon Jan 12, 2009 7:04 pm
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From: byrd45 (Original Message) Sent: 11/4/2007 5:31 PM
Hi Everyone,
You might think that is a strange title for this discussion but the thing I would like to bring to everyone's attention and I am sure you have all been there is.... People asking How are you doing,feeling etc. alot because you have RSD. Now everyone handles this different and that is what I want to talk about how you handle it and how it makes you feel too. I think if I answered honestly all the time the would run away into the hills themselves and I wouldn't blame them. People like to live their lives free of any unpleasantness whenever possible and lets face it RSD can get mighty unpleasant alot of the time as often as on a daily basis.Personally I wish they would stop asking because most don't really want a truthful answer and I am too tired from being in constant pain at this point to have to think up another little white cover today. I'm sorry if I sound mean but there is a certain person in my life that asks that question alot and they mean it to be caring but they don't want the real answer which puts me in an awkward spot. Do you lie to save their feelings or do you tell the truth and then have that uncomfortable silence hanging between you after you announce just how horribly sick you really are that particular day. I've found their are two groups of people group one who care alot about you and it really scares them to know the truth, and the second group really was just asking out of politeness and don't want you to go into all of it and hope you will just say fine or okay something like that. I find the whole thing annoying and frustrating and wish that people at this point just wouldn't ask me anymore except for you guys that's different. You are in the same boat which changes things so I know you all understand. Anyway I was wondering how you all handle this in your life? Does it frustrate you as much as me? I guess I just don't want to focus on how bad I am feeling all the time and when they ask it brings my focus there you know. I would love to hear everyone's feelings on this and know how you deal with this too if you feel like you want to share your thoughts or feelings please just add them to this post.
Love,
Robyn
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From: Rittlemom1 Sent: 11/4/2007 8:31 PM
yes yes yes I agree with you, most of the time I don't even think they wait to hear the answer after they ask the question. Ya know if they don't want to hear the answer anymore than we want to give it then how about lets just skip that part and get to the point of the conversation , or just wave if your just passing by or what ever. It would be so much easier for both of us. I get the feeling that they are thinking yeah yeah same old same old and you know what damn it your right I am living that same old same old and its no damn fun , so if you don't want to be bothered don't ask cause I sure won't bother to voulunteer any info to you !! Right ? I don't think it takes long for us to figure out who's who. Like you said when we ask each other we really are interested in whats going on in each others life and comparing notes and experiences , helping each other. Do I sound a little angry too ? frustrated? yep still a work in progress you could say. Kathy
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From: shellie Sent: 11/4/2007 9:20 PM
Great way to say it is, "you really do not want to know". I change the subject to what I have done or want to get done. I on the other hand do not get in public other than going to the store or doctor so no one but here really gives a crap how I am doing. The only friends I have are here in group and once every few months I see the ladies from Big Spring. The Mayor and his wife check in on me a few times a week but other than that group is it.
I would like to know how to get Rancie on board enough to know when I need help when he is home to jump in and help, because after I ask once, I'm not begging for help.
Gary and I both over did today, but it has been a great day. My apricot tree out back is old and does not produce. I picked up a new one and planted it 20 feet from the old one that still gets leaves for shade. Then we did the same with the pear to help cross pollination. It does produce but this will help add more. Then we dug a hole to put in a planter pot water fall in front of the roses and put in a few little flower plants to brighten up the green roses with no flowers blooming on them for the fall. It has taken 11 hours and both our hands are full of blisters and I will be sorry later but for now I feel like the richest person in the world. I spent the day with my teenage son talking and planting. Few blisters is not a bad price.
I Pray you all have a great week and take time to enjoy what you can do and not dwell on what you can not. That is how I make it through.
Love and (((HUGS))) Shellie
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From: Gillian996 Sent: 11/4/2007 10:41 PM
I'VE ALWAYS HATED WHEN FRIENDS HAVE ASKED ME HOW I'AM, BECAUSE I ALWAYS KNEW THAT THEY DIDN'T REALLY WANT TO KNOW SO WHY ASK!!!!
SOMETIMES WHEN THIS EX FRIEND WOULD PHONE AND ASK HOW I WAS, I WOULD SAY DON'T ASK AND SHE WOULD KEEP ON ASKING AND WHEN I WOULD TELL HER SHE WOULD SAY - I WISH I HADN'T ASKED.
FINALLY ONE TIME I SAID TO HER, WHEN I SAY DON'T ASK I MEAN DON'T ASK BECAUSE I'M HAVING A VERY BAD DAY AND JUST TALK SOMETHING ELSE. SHE NEVER GOT IT AND USE TO TELL ME THAT I THOUGHT ABOUT RSD GOING IN ME AND THAT'S WHY I HAD IT BECAUSE THAT IS HER BELIEF. AND LIKE I SAID, SHE IS NOW AN EX-FRIEND!
USUALLY WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME, I KNOW THEY ARE JUST MAKING CONVERSATION AND DON'T REALLY WANT TO KNOW SO I USUALLY JUST ANSWER, SO-SO AND THEY QUICKLY CHANGE THE SUBJECT!
THAT'S ALSO HOW I ANSWER MOST OF THE TIME WHEN MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS ALSO ASK ME AS, IT'S EASIER THAT WAY. BECAUSE THEY REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW AND I DON'T REALLY WANT TO KEEP BRINGING IT UP EITHER BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT I HAVE AND I RATHER THEY AND I TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE TO GET MY MIND OFF OF IT!
I REALLY HATE WHEN SOMEONE SAYS THOUGH, WELL YOU LOOK SO GOOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE IN SO MUCH PAIN, LIKE I'M LYING. AND WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS, PEOPLE ARE JUST CRAZY WHEN THEY THINK THAT!!!! I GOT THAT FROM SOMEONE LAST WEEK WHO HADN'T SEEN ME IN AWHILE. I REALLY WANTED TO SCREAM AT THEM. INSTEAD I SHOWED THEM MY HANDS AND THEY COULD SEE HOW SWOLLEN I WAS AND THAT I COULD BARELY OPEN MY FINGERS UP AND THEN, THEY FELT BAD THAT THEY SAID THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!
I REALLY THINK PEOPLE SHOULD THINK BEFORE THEY SPEAK BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH THEY MAY NOT MEAN IT, THEY CAN BE VERY HURTFUL. THIS COULD ALSO MEAN WHY I DON'T SEE OR TALK TO ALOT OF PEOPLE ANYMORE EITHER BY PHONE OR JUST SEEING THEM AS, I'M TIRED OF GETTING HURT ALL OF THE TIME. AS, THEY CAN BE SO CRUEL!!!
I WOULDN'T WISH RSD ON ANYONE BUT, WHEN I LOOK AT CERTAIN FRIENDS OR EX-FRIENDS, I DON'T THINK THEY COULD HANDLE THIS PAIN THAT WE ALL GO THROUGH EACH AND EVERY DAY AND NIGHT!!!!!! LIKE I HAVE THIS ONE FRIEND WHO GOES ON AND ON SOMETIMES ABOUT A LITTLE PAPER CUT OR A SPRAIN SHE HAS AND TELLS ME THAT, I HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT THE PAIN SHE IS IN AND I JUST LOOK AT HER AND CAN'T BELIEVE SHE SAYS THAT!! NO WAY WOULD THEY EVER BE ABLE TO COPE WITH RSD OR ANYTHING FOR THAT MATTER!!!!
TAKE SPECIAL CARE ALL OF YOU HERE IN OUR WONDERFUL GROUP AS, THIS GROUP MEANS SO MUCH TO ME!!!! AND YOU ARE ALL IN OUR PRAYERS!!!!
TUPPY SENDS WOOFS AND KISSES AND I SEND GENTLE HUGS TO YOU ALL!!!!
GILLIAN AND TUPPY
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From: Bunnybigfoot1 Sent: 11/5/2007 1:19 AM
I do get frustrated also!!! On friday a co-worker who has cronic back pain asked how I was. I Told her how exhausted I was after sleeping in my van for 4 days and coming home to clean and clean and clean. Not sleeping as the wild fires were still going on. All this stress and lack of sleep had sent my pain level over the top. She was the only one who understood and the others didn't want to hear it. Also, my daughter and I go to my mom's house to visit on weekends. I just couldn't do it this weekend. Saturday I slept 14 hours at night and still took a nap during the day. Sunday I felt almost like I had a hangover. A RSD hangover if you will. I explained it to her, but I don't think she understood. She is usually good about things like that, but this time she said maybe you need to take vitamins! It made me feel bad, but what can you do. I wish people understood!!!! Jeannie
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Recommend Delete Message 6 of 12 in Discussion
From: EMY2628 Sent: 11/5/2007 1:53 AM
I AGREE WITH EVERYONE ELSE, I WOULD RATHER THAT PEOPLE DID NOT ASK, BUT I BELIEVE THEY ARE JUST BEING POLITE AND SOMETIMES TRULY CONCERNED. MOSTLY IT IS THE LADIES FROM CHRUCH WHO ASK AND INSTEAD OF GOING INTO A BIG LONG DISCRIPTION, I JUST SAY, WELL I AM STILL HERE AND THAT'S ABOUT ALL I CAN SAY.
MY PROBLEM IS THAT THEY ALWAY WANT TO GIVE ME A HUG AND IT REALLY HURTS ME, BUT I AM NOT SURE HOW TO TELL THEM THAT THEY ARE HURTING ME WITHOUT SEEMING RUDE OR UNGRATEFULL FOR THE FACT THAT THEY DO CARE.
WITH MY FAMILY, MY SON AND DAUGHTER NEVER REALLY ASK ME HOW I FEEL UNLESS THEY WANT SOMETHING AND MY HUSBAND EVER DAY SAYS WHAT'S THE MATTER AND SOMETIMES I JUST OUTRIGHT YELL AT HIM AND SAY THE SAME THING THAT IS WRONG EVERY OTHER DAY OF MY LIFE I AM IN PAIN AND I HURT!!!!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PROPER WAY TO RESPOND IS, OR WHAT THE PROPER WAY TO SAY PLEASE DON'T HUG ME IS, BUT I GUESS SOMEDAY I WILL FIGURE IT ALL OUT.
TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS YOU ALL
EILEEN
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Recommend Delete Message 7 of 12 in Discussion
From: DocSuess Sent: 11/8/2007 6:58 PM
I just do not talk about my pain anymore. Even when I go to my doctors. I just give them the number and the location. Now, no one ask me any more. I do think that I do have an advantage being a man. Man do not ask other men how they are doing. We can spend a whole day fishing and not say 25 words. That can be a good thing when you have RSD. I just do not get out fishing as much, just one time this year.
Lou
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Recommend Delete Message 8 of 12 in Discussion
From: Northstarmn Sent: 11/12/2007 1:56 AM
oh wow...
I believe because i hide because of my pain and fear, that I don't have alot of these questions... i am so very sorry foreveryone's pain and the questions that pop into your lives paulene
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Recommend Delete Message 9 of 12 in Discussion
From: byrd45 Sent: 11/14/2007 11:37 AM
Hi Paulene,
You are so nice to say that! How horrible that you feel you have to hide because of pain I'm sorry that it is bad like that I do that too and I hate the fact it makes me want to be alone. It's really not fair sometimes.I guess we all do what we have to so we can survive this thing and that is what ever you need to.
Love,
Robyn
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Recommend Delete Message 10 of 12 in Discussion
From: Liz3079 Sent: 11/15/2007 9:57 AM
Hi to all
I hate it when someone asks how I am.I usually say i suppose ok.But somedays,and I have to go to the laundromat so you all can imagine how painful that is I am moaning and groaning a lot everytime i move my wrist,especially folding clothes and then someone may ask what is wrong and i say i have rsd and they say whats that and then they procede to compare it to arthritis and what i should be doing for it. I am sick of hearing how i should be taking this or that and how using my wrist is good for it and i hurt and my hand is shriveled because i dont use.sometimes i just look at them and dont even say another word.if they arent educated about rsd and exactly what it is then i dont need their ideas on cures.and that is why oprah or montel should do a show on rsd,so we can more or less be left alone when we say we have rsd.i am sure they are trying to be caring which they are but im not gong to get better and im not going to be able to have surgery and on and on .i know everyone here has been through this over and over.I know i also sound mean but geez,i dont feel good,im miserable and using my wrist for repetitve work folding my laundry sure isnt going to make it better,only cause a flare up and right now im in a major flare up.i doubt i am going to be able to even type anymore on posts but i want to.i just hope you guys still like me.i just havent felt like posting.i get so depressed about everything.
love to all
liz
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From: shellie Sent: 11/15/2007 12:25 PM
Liz, I know how you feel. I also know if someone asks because they do not know we should help spread the word even one person at a time. I know some days it is hard to expect us to be nice and talk open about our pain. I tell people if you really want to know come spend a day with me, do a google on "what is RSD" I just had this very thing happen to me. One of Gary's friends came over and he was very polite and asked "what's wrong, if you don't mind my asking" I said it would be best if you just go in the office and type what is rsd in google and click on RSDhope it has things wrote out a lot better than I could ever explain it and if you want to ask anything after you have an idea of what I have you are welcome to ask anything.
I found that he wanted to know more than my own kids about RSD. He is not scared of me nor is he worried of hurting my feelings. I figure that he will tell his mom and gossip runs like fire in a little town so maybe with luck they will know I can not give it to them and I do not get out but they are welcome to stop in for coffee. He will come back now that he knows he can not catch something from me. That is nice for Gary because he does not have friends stop in.
Have a great day! Things will get better and remember God only gives us what we can handle, RSD'ers are a tough bunch.
(((HUGS))) Shellie
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From: Liz3079 Sent: 11/15/2007 2:46 PM
Hi SHellie
I have told people to look rsd up on teh computer,especially when I was still having to work.Theyd just look at me.Then several days later,Id hear the same thing .Your wrist looks horrible.Does it hurt.Why is it all purple,this was the same people who a couple days earlier asked what is wrong with your wrist or why do you always wear a glove on your hand or why dont you want the fan blowing on you.Its like duh,i just tried to explain the other day.guess you didnt listen.sometimes id just get downright rude. Yeh, Im sure in a small town then people will be talking about you.Yes, they should come spend a day to see what its like for you.I try to be tough but sometimes everything overwhelms me.Thanks for the reply shellie.I was hoping everyone didnt give up on me. I just am too overwhelmed to even come here sometimes.
love liz
Recommend Delete Message 1 of 12 in Discussion
From: byrd45 (Original Message) Sent: 11/4/2007 5:31 PM
Hi Everyone,
You might think that is a strange title for this discussion but the thing I would like to bring to everyone's attention and I am sure you have all been there is.... People asking How are you doing,feeling etc. alot because you have RSD. Now everyone handles this different and that is what I want to talk about how you handle it and how it makes you feel too. I think if I answered honestly all the time the would run away into the hills themselves and I wouldn't blame them. People like to live their lives free of any unpleasantness whenever possible and lets face it RSD can get mighty unpleasant alot of the time as often as on a daily basis.Personally I wish they would stop asking because most don't really want a truthful answer and I am too tired from being in constant pain at this point to have to think up another little white cover today. I'm sorry if I sound mean but there is a certain person in my life that asks that question alot and they mean it to be caring but they don't want the real answer which puts me in an awkward spot. Do you lie to save their feelings or do you tell the truth and then have that uncomfortable silence hanging between you after you announce just how horribly sick you really are that particular day. I've found their are two groups of people group one who care alot about you and it really scares them to know the truth, and the second group really was just asking out of politeness and don't want you to go into all of it and hope you will just say fine or okay something like that. I find the whole thing annoying and frustrating and wish that people at this point just wouldn't ask me anymore except for you guys that's different. You are in the same boat which changes things so I know you all understand. Anyway I was wondering how you all handle this in your life? Does it frustrate you as much as me? I guess I just don't want to focus on how bad I am feeling all the time and when they ask it brings my focus there you know. I would love to hear everyone's feelings on this and know how you deal with this too if you feel like you want to share your thoughts or feelings please just add them to this post.
Love,
Robyn
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From: Rittlemom1 Sent: 11/4/2007 8:31 PM
yes yes yes I agree with you, most of the time I don't even think they wait to hear the answer after they ask the question. Ya know if they don't want to hear the answer anymore than we want to give it then how about lets just skip that part and get to the point of the conversation , or just wave if your just passing by or what ever. It would be so much easier for both of us. I get the feeling that they are thinking yeah yeah same old same old and you know what damn it your right I am living that same old same old and its no damn fun , so if you don't want to be bothered don't ask cause I sure won't bother to voulunteer any info to you !! Right ? I don't think it takes long for us to figure out who's who. Like you said when we ask each other we really are interested in whats going on in each others life and comparing notes and experiences , helping each other. Do I sound a little angry too ? frustrated? yep still a work in progress you could say. Kathy
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From: shellie Sent: 11/4/2007 9:20 PM
Great way to say it is, "you really do not want to know". I change the subject to what I have done or want to get done. I on the other hand do not get in public other than going to the store or doctor so no one but here really gives a crap how I am doing. The only friends I have are here in group and once every few months I see the ladies from Big Spring. The Mayor and his wife check in on me a few times a week but other than that group is it.
I would like to know how to get Rancie on board enough to know when I need help when he is home to jump in and help, because after I ask once, I'm not begging for help.
Gary and I both over did today, but it has been a great day. My apricot tree out back is old and does not produce. I picked up a new one and planted it 20 feet from the old one that still gets leaves for shade. Then we did the same with the pear to help cross pollination. It does produce but this will help add more. Then we dug a hole to put in a planter pot water fall in front of the roses and put in a few little flower plants to brighten up the green roses with no flowers blooming on them for the fall. It has taken 11 hours and both our hands are full of blisters and I will be sorry later but for now I feel like the richest person in the world. I spent the day with my teenage son talking and planting. Few blisters is not a bad price.
I Pray you all have a great week and take time to enjoy what you can do and not dwell on what you can not. That is how I make it through.
Love and (((HUGS))) Shellie
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From: Gillian996 Sent: 11/4/2007 10:41 PM
I'VE ALWAYS HATED WHEN FRIENDS HAVE ASKED ME HOW I'AM, BECAUSE I ALWAYS KNEW THAT THEY DIDN'T REALLY WANT TO KNOW SO WHY ASK!!!!
SOMETIMES WHEN THIS EX FRIEND WOULD PHONE AND ASK HOW I WAS, I WOULD SAY DON'T ASK AND SHE WOULD KEEP ON ASKING AND WHEN I WOULD TELL HER SHE WOULD SAY - I WISH I HADN'T ASKED.
FINALLY ONE TIME I SAID TO HER, WHEN I SAY DON'T ASK I MEAN DON'T ASK BECAUSE I'M HAVING A VERY BAD DAY AND JUST TALK SOMETHING ELSE. SHE NEVER GOT IT AND USE TO TELL ME THAT I THOUGHT ABOUT RSD GOING IN ME AND THAT'S WHY I HAD IT BECAUSE THAT IS HER BELIEF. AND LIKE I SAID, SHE IS NOW AN EX-FRIEND!
USUALLY WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME, I KNOW THEY ARE JUST MAKING CONVERSATION AND DON'T REALLY WANT TO KNOW SO I USUALLY JUST ANSWER, SO-SO AND THEY QUICKLY CHANGE THE SUBJECT!
THAT'S ALSO HOW I ANSWER MOST OF THE TIME WHEN MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS ALSO ASK ME AS, IT'S EASIER THAT WAY. BECAUSE THEY REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW AND I DON'T REALLY WANT TO KEEP BRINGING IT UP EITHER BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT I HAVE AND I RATHER THEY AND I TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE TO GET MY MIND OFF OF IT!
I REALLY HATE WHEN SOMEONE SAYS THOUGH, WELL YOU LOOK SO GOOD, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE IN SO MUCH PAIN, LIKE I'M LYING. AND WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT SOMETHING LIKE THIS, PEOPLE ARE JUST CRAZY WHEN THEY THINK THAT!!!! I GOT THAT FROM SOMEONE LAST WEEK WHO HADN'T SEEN ME IN AWHILE. I REALLY WANTED TO SCREAM AT THEM. INSTEAD I SHOWED THEM MY HANDS AND THEY COULD SEE HOW SWOLLEN I WAS AND THAT I COULD BARELY OPEN MY FINGERS UP AND THEN, THEY FELT BAD THAT THEY SAID THAT IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!
I REALLY THINK PEOPLE SHOULD THINK BEFORE THEY SPEAK BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH THEY MAY NOT MEAN IT, THEY CAN BE VERY HURTFUL. THIS COULD ALSO MEAN WHY I DON'T SEE OR TALK TO ALOT OF PEOPLE ANYMORE EITHER BY PHONE OR JUST SEEING THEM AS, I'M TIRED OF GETTING HURT ALL OF THE TIME. AS, THEY CAN BE SO CRUEL!!!
I WOULDN'T WISH RSD ON ANYONE BUT, WHEN I LOOK AT CERTAIN FRIENDS OR EX-FRIENDS, I DON'T THINK THEY COULD HANDLE THIS PAIN THAT WE ALL GO THROUGH EACH AND EVERY DAY AND NIGHT!!!!!! LIKE I HAVE THIS ONE FRIEND WHO GOES ON AND ON SOMETIMES ABOUT A LITTLE PAPER CUT OR A SPRAIN SHE HAS AND TELLS ME THAT, I HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT THE PAIN SHE IS IN AND I JUST LOOK AT HER AND CAN'T BELIEVE SHE SAYS THAT!! NO WAY WOULD THEY EVER BE ABLE TO COPE WITH RSD OR ANYTHING FOR THAT MATTER!!!!
TAKE SPECIAL CARE ALL OF YOU HERE IN OUR WONDERFUL GROUP AS, THIS GROUP MEANS SO MUCH TO ME!!!! AND YOU ARE ALL IN OUR PRAYERS!!!!
TUPPY SENDS WOOFS AND KISSES AND I SEND GENTLE HUGS TO YOU ALL!!!!
GILLIAN AND TUPPY
Reply
Recommend Delete Message 5 of 12 in Discussion
From: Bunnybigfoot1 Sent: 11/5/2007 1:19 AM
I do get frustrated also!!! On friday a co-worker who has cronic back pain asked how I was. I Told her how exhausted I was after sleeping in my van for 4 days and coming home to clean and clean and clean. Not sleeping as the wild fires were still going on. All this stress and lack of sleep had sent my pain level over the top. She was the only one who understood and the others didn't want to hear it. Also, my daughter and I go to my mom's house to visit on weekends. I just couldn't do it this weekend. Saturday I slept 14 hours at night and still took a nap during the day. Sunday I felt almost like I had a hangover. A RSD hangover if you will. I explained it to her, but I don't think she understood. She is usually good about things like that, but this time she said maybe you need to take vitamins! It made me feel bad, but what can you do. I wish people understood!!!! Jeannie
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Recommend Delete Message 6 of 12 in Discussion
From: EMY2628 Sent: 11/5/2007 1:53 AM
I AGREE WITH EVERYONE ELSE, I WOULD RATHER THAT PEOPLE DID NOT ASK, BUT I BELIEVE THEY ARE JUST BEING POLITE AND SOMETIMES TRULY CONCERNED. MOSTLY IT IS THE LADIES FROM CHRUCH WHO ASK AND INSTEAD OF GOING INTO A BIG LONG DISCRIPTION, I JUST SAY, WELL I AM STILL HERE AND THAT'S ABOUT ALL I CAN SAY.
MY PROBLEM IS THAT THEY ALWAY WANT TO GIVE ME A HUG AND IT REALLY HURTS ME, BUT I AM NOT SURE HOW TO TELL THEM THAT THEY ARE HURTING ME WITHOUT SEEMING RUDE OR UNGRATEFULL FOR THE FACT THAT THEY DO CARE.
WITH MY FAMILY, MY SON AND DAUGHTER NEVER REALLY ASK ME HOW I FEEL UNLESS THEY WANT SOMETHING AND MY HUSBAND EVER DAY SAYS WHAT'S THE MATTER AND SOMETIMES I JUST OUTRIGHT YELL AT HIM AND SAY THE SAME THING THAT IS WRONG EVERY OTHER DAY OF MY LIFE I AM IN PAIN AND I HURT!!!!
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PROPER WAY TO RESPOND IS, OR WHAT THE PROPER WAY TO SAY PLEASE DON'T HUG ME IS, BUT I GUESS SOMEDAY I WILL FIGURE IT ALL OUT.
TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS YOU ALL
EILEEN
Reply
Recommend Delete Message 7 of 12 in Discussion
From: DocSuess Sent: 11/8/2007 6:58 PM
I just do not talk about my pain anymore. Even when I go to my doctors. I just give them the number and the location. Now, no one ask me any more. I do think that I do have an advantage being a man. Man do not ask other men how they are doing. We can spend a whole day fishing and not say 25 words. That can be a good thing when you have RSD. I just do not get out fishing as much, just one time this year.
Lou
Reply
Recommend Delete Message 8 of 12 in Discussion
From: Northstarmn Sent: 11/12/2007 1:56 AM
oh wow...
I believe because i hide because of my pain and fear, that I don't have alot of these questions... i am so very sorry foreveryone's pain and the questions that pop into your lives paulene
Reply
Recommend Delete Message 9 of 12 in Discussion
From: byrd45 Sent: 11/14/2007 11:37 AM
Hi Paulene,
You are so nice to say that! How horrible that you feel you have to hide because of pain I'm sorry that it is bad like that I do that too and I hate the fact it makes me want to be alone. It's really not fair sometimes.I guess we all do what we have to so we can survive this thing and that is what ever you need to.
Love,
Robyn
Reply
Recommend Delete Message 10 of 12 in Discussion
From: Liz3079 Sent: 11/15/2007 9:57 AM
Hi to all
I hate it when someone asks how I am.I usually say i suppose ok.But somedays,and I have to go to the laundromat so you all can imagine how painful that is I am moaning and groaning a lot everytime i move my wrist,especially folding clothes and then someone may ask what is wrong and i say i have rsd and they say whats that and then they procede to compare it to arthritis and what i should be doing for it. I am sick of hearing how i should be taking this or that and how using my wrist is good for it and i hurt and my hand is shriveled because i dont use.sometimes i just look at them and dont even say another word.if they arent educated about rsd and exactly what it is then i dont need their ideas on cures.and that is why oprah or montel should do a show on rsd,so we can more or less be left alone when we say we have rsd.i am sure they are trying to be caring which they are but im not gong to get better and im not going to be able to have surgery and on and on .i know everyone here has been through this over and over.I know i also sound mean but geez,i dont feel good,im miserable and using my wrist for repetitve work folding my laundry sure isnt going to make it better,only cause a flare up and right now im in a major flare up.i doubt i am going to be able to even type anymore on posts but i want to.i just hope you guys still like me.i just havent felt like posting.i get so depressed about everything.
love to all
liz
Reply
Recommend Delete Message 11 of 12 in Discussion
From: shellie Sent: 11/15/2007 12:25 PM
Liz, I know how you feel. I also know if someone asks because they do not know we should help spread the word even one person at a time. I know some days it is hard to expect us to be nice and talk open about our pain. I tell people if you really want to know come spend a day with me, do a google on "what is RSD" I just had this very thing happen to me. One of Gary's friends came over and he was very polite and asked "what's wrong, if you don't mind my asking" I said it would be best if you just go in the office and type what is rsd in google and click on RSDhope it has things wrote out a lot better than I could ever explain it and if you want to ask anything after you have an idea of what I have you are welcome to ask anything.
I found that he wanted to know more than my own kids about RSD. He is not scared of me nor is he worried of hurting my feelings. I figure that he will tell his mom and gossip runs like fire in a little town so maybe with luck they will know I can not give it to them and I do not get out but they are welcome to stop in for coffee. He will come back now that he knows he can not catch something from me. That is nice for Gary because he does not have friends stop in.
Have a great day! Things will get better and remember God only gives us what we can handle, RSD'ers are a tough bunch.
(((HUGS))) Shellie
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Recommend Delete Message 12 of 12 in Discussion
From: Liz3079 Sent: 11/15/2007 2:46 PM
Hi SHellie
I have told people to look rsd up on teh computer,especially when I was still having to work.Theyd just look at me.Then several days later,Id hear the same thing .Your wrist looks horrible.Does it hurt.Why is it all purple,this was the same people who a couple days earlier asked what is wrong with your wrist or why do you always wear a glove on your hand or why dont you want the fan blowing on you.Its like duh,i just tried to explain the other day.guess you didnt listen.sometimes id just get downright rude. Yeh, Im sure in a small town then people will be talking about you.Yes, they should come spend a day to see what its like for you.I try to be tough but sometimes everything overwhelms me.Thanks for the reply shellie.I was hoping everyone didnt give up on me. I just am too overwhelmed to even come here sometimes.
love liz
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